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I don't even know where to start! A couple years ago, my then 13 year old son, my wife, and I drove to a wonderful part of St. Louis, down a dark alley and bought a 92 fox body convertible that needed a decent amount of TLC. The thoughts were that it would be a father/son project to maybe get my boys off of the video games. Unfortunately being a full time Nursing student, money and time were and still are at a minimum so it hasn't moved along very fast.

On April 22nd, my son, the son that stood on that u-haul trailer, in a St. Louis alley, with a grin on his face, next to that red fox body mustang, Tanner Rupinski, walked approximately 3/4 of a mile from our house, down a dirt road, and took his own life with my pistol. We have been devastated beyond belief. I often don't get out of bed until noon but yesterday I did finally make my way back to the garage and got a little work done on the rear end of the car. It felt good to get out there and work on it but my head spins trying to figure out how to get this thing done. Now with funeral expenses on top of everything else, it is even further from becoming a reality. I have considered starting a gofundme to help raise money to make this car a bad ass, crazy fast, crazy loud, tribute car. I have had so many thoughts go through my head. I considered doing this and if it works out, sell the car at auction and donate the proceeds to a suicide awareness charity but I really don't know if I could part with the car. I really am at a loss and sometimes I feel like I'm losing my mind. I'm not a person that likes to ask for charity and I don't know if it is even allowed here but if I were to set up a gofundme, would I be able to share it here? Like I said, I don't even know if I'm going to do this but I needed to vent a bit. I don't post on here really mostly a lurker but I would like to get this car done and make it a tribute car. Maybe travel to car shows and raise money for suicide awareness. I have considered a coyote swap, termi swap, or even crazier v10 swap... so many things have gone through my head but as I've said, with the loss of my son I just feel like I'm going to lose my mind sometimes. What brought me to make this post here was how I felt last night working on the car. It was like I felt like I was on vacation from my depression. It was like a one on one garage therapy session and maybe my son was sitting next to me in spirit...I have no clue but after coming into the house and going to bed, I just laid there and cried and couldn't get to sleep. I think maybe I fell asleep at 3-4 A.M.? Maybe. Anyhow, sorry for rambling. I would enjoy any feedback or thoughts on this. I even thought if someone wanted to donate some time and come work on the car with me, or donate parts? I don't know...
 

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I pray that God gives you and your family peace in this difficult trial. A tribute/suicide awareness car sounds like a great idea as many are fighting different personal circumstances. It can be a "therapy" car... who doesn't feel in awe sitting/riding in a powerful car for a few seconds.


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Discussion Starter #3
I pray that God gives you and your family peace in this difficult trial. A tribute/suicide awareness car sounds like a great idea as many are fighting different personal circumstances. It can be a "therapy" car... who doesn't feel in awe sitting/riding in a powerful car for a few seconds.


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Thank you, Nine3cobra.

I really don't want charity as much as I would so love an avenue to build this car in memory of my son. My sister started a gofundme page back when it happened to help with our funeral expenses and it did raise some money. Not a whole lot but that's kind of where I came up with this idea. I've never used gofundme myself but when I tried to share her page hoping to drum up some support on the funeral expense page, I was accused of being a scammer due to my Facebook user-name being Johnny Doe. I'm fairly anti-social-media and just created that as a means of getting on Facebook without the drama of the world following me around. Not that I could care less as I would really love to make this an amazing car, but, really just a smiling face to help put it together would be awesome. Or, maybe some of you have lost a son, daughter, or family member in the same manor. I assure you all I'm a legitimate father whom is lost in the wake of his 15 year old son taking his own life. I really expected more people to at least give some feedback. Really, I don't know what I expected. If there is doubt regarding my post, you are all welcome to google my son, Tanner Rupinski and I'd be happy to chat on the phone or do whatever may need be done to prove this is not some bull#### story. Truthfully, I'm just completely lost and would really love to find a means of making this project, whatever this project may be, a reality. If anyone wants to chat, message me. Also, as I previously mentioned, my Facebook name is Johnny Doe. There are other Johnny Does but I'm the one from Altamont, IL.
 
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